Anger Management

Anger – A word that makes you look back at many moments when you lost your cool, without your permission. You did not want to say those words or for them to sound as they did, but the damage is done and now you must apologise even though you believe that your point was valid. The subject matter in many arguments remain untouched and the fight becomes about who said what and how. The humiliation of being in the right yet being wrong, makes you want to hate yourself for not keeping calm at that spur of the moment.
This article is for those who know that their logic is great, but just sometimes, they need to have more control over the outburst.
Distance : This can make a heart grow fonder or eat up all the hearts involved. There is a fine line between taking a step back to allow your logic to take over your rage and to allow your ego to take over that logic. If you are using distance to get back to the other person, you are no less than those loud abusive words. You perhaps may be suffering from confrontation issues or more so a low self-esteem.

However, when you step back to give the logical side of your brain the power to take over the rage-causing hormones, you are doing this planet a huge favour. 2 hours, that is enough time to save you from causing hurt and cutting off the entry of ego, if of course, the intent is to resolve and move forward.
Self Talk : The poison OR lifesaver. When you are angry, besides your hormones playing games with you, your memory suddenly becomes vivid and brings back to you all the past negative experiences to serve as your machine gun and your assumption of the future to serve as bombs.
Weapons for mass destruction. This is nothing but your negative mind, giving you enough of content to make sure you damage your relationship forever and remain enslaved at its feet. These talks are not to make you feel powerful but to make you behave more stupidly than you ever could in a sane mind and when your logical side wakes up to the mess, you will be shocked at what you did. So, control it. Tell your mind to “Shut up” when what it is telling you is not leading you to growth and positive development.
Language : When you take that 2 hours break and control the self-talk, the best thing to do is to turn your sentences around. It isn’t simply said, that words can hurt and also heal. You didn’t take that 2 hours break to run away but to simply calm down and then address and resolve the issue. You also didn’t take that time out to go back into a discussion as the same noisy person. Defensive sentences are not going to save you from the destruction that you will create with them.So, stick to the subject and bring in some compassion. Drive some understanding down by turning your sentences around to help the other person translate correctly and resolve the dispute. For eg. “I am so angry with you,” become, “I feel let down and disappointed.” “You always do this,” become “I am trying to understand what made you do this.’ Use Anger as a resource for Creation not Destruction.